I'm Here

Well, I say I'm here. My mind has been wandering...thus no tracker postings. This has to be forever. This has to be livable. I have to allow room for times when I have to eat out, or at someone elses's house, when I can't be in control of it all. And I have to allow myself a treat every once in a while, because if I don't, I will binge on certain foods, or feel deprived. I am always coming up with a new play. While that really frustrates me, I believe that I am just trying to make it work for myself, and make it forever!
For this week...
1. Track
2. Eliminate processed foods when I am at home.
3. Save myself 2 to 4 points every other day for a little treat, like natural coffee ice cream.

There is the plan. Pray for me!

Binges

I really binged on food last night. My husband was a church for worship practice and the kdis were in the bed, so I decided to eat. I would like to say first, that I wasn't hungry. Second, that I knew what I was doing wasn't right (because of the first). Third, I ate it all so fast that I didn't really even taste it.
When my husband got home, I confessed it to him. I wrote it down in my journal and I just updated my May 7th post. I wanted to hide it, because that is what I do sometimes. That is the shame and guilt that I feel. I made a choice last night to not be a victim and to own it.
Today is a new day! I am looking forward to this day. It is going to be a good one.
And, I won't binge while my husband is at the fire station tonight. I won't. I am making the choice right now to not do it!